Friday, 5 June 2015

I am man, hear me...erm...sorry.

The gym which I frequently frequent has been undergoing extensive renovations, including the male changing room. For the past several weeks I've had to endure dust, noise and filth to maintain my regular swims.

At last we had a brand new locker room. And then the men were told to use the female locker room whilst that was renovated, the females moving into the new locker room. Why? Because, I was told, it was OK for men to put up with filthy conditions but not women.

Just one example of many in which I, as a man, am discriminated against. I'll insert hugely important point #1 here; I am absolutely aware that women get discriminated too, more often than men (so I'm told) and this is why I am an unwavering feminist.

But treating men like shit is equally unacceptable and occurrences such as the one I mention above often go unnoticed. Because, as a 'privileged' male, I would be told that I have no right to feel discriminated against, and so I keep quiet about it.

The kink/alternative/whatever-the-hell-you-want-to-call-it scene is one in which men get shit upon regularly (yes, obvious pun is obvious). Here's hugely important point #2; a small number of men are, in general (though not exclusively), responsible for this.

Men are automatically viewed with suspicion. Men have to pay more to get into clubs. In CMNF the female is appreciated, in CFNM the male is humiliated. Male Doms are honoured to have subs (I do feel honoured), female Doms get paid to have subs.

It's tough. It can be really, really tough. I don't put up with misogyny but I wouldn't last on the scene if I didn't tolerate misandry.

The thing is, I'm only willing to tolerate unfairness for so long but will continue to strive towards a more balanced world for both men and women and anyone who doesn't identify with these genders. If only those few men would stop ruining it all for the rest of us.

I was reluctant to write this post as I fear the response it will get. One of my fellow bloggers also wrote a post about how difficult it can be a man (You're not as fly as you think you are) and his fear of the backlash. It shouldn't be like this.


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  2. I'm not sure why you expect backlash, but I think you're perfectly reasonable in your view. I wish it were as simple as: everyone is equal and that's that.
    (Ugh, spell check doesn't like me. It's so wrong all the time.)

    1. Thank you. I expect backlash if people who don't know me well enough see this and think that I'm acting hard done by, and because it is often assumed that those who defend men must be naturally anti-women.

  3. Replies
    1. I thought and hoped you may. I was hesitant to link to your blog in case it drew unwanted attention...let me know if you want me to remove it.