Monday, 1 January 2018

Tinder dating

I have four dates lined up this week. It's been a while since I took this step (see previous blog post for reason why) and this time I wanted to try dating apps other than OK Cupid.

OKC has in the past been excellent at matching me with suitable women but lately there have been a few misses. And then they decided to enforce real names on its users. That's OK with me Cupid, but I fully understand why others may wish to protect their anonymity.

So now it's time to try something different. Bumble is an app which, should you match with someone, allows only the woman to make first contact. She has 24hrs to do so and, if she doesn't, the match dies forever. A good concept as it empowers the woman, a bad concept as it seems to empower many women to not bother reading profiles, open with "Hi ;)" and nothing else (please! Put in some effort!) and generally treat men like shit (many of whom no doubt deserve/like it).

Next; Tinder. I have four Tinder dates lined up this week alone. Yes, one or two will no doubt cancel at the last minute. This happens depressingly frequently. But still, I'm impressed - so far - with how this app is working out.

I approached Tinder warily and with a descriptive profile that laid out as much of my (open marriage) situation and desires as space would allow. After a while I slapped a 'PLEASE READ' at the beginning. Amazingly people now did read it and responded to the 'feel free to ask questions' invitation.

Many still swiped right on the pictures alone but, when this resulted in a match, they dug a little deeper and wanted to know more. I was amazed. Tinder, as you may well know, has a reputation for being there for hook ups. But some intrepid folk I admire have actually managed to find something deeper than one night stands through it.

Seeking a D/s relationship I definitely need something deeper than a quick fuck. 'Meaningful connection' may be a cliche, but it's a necessity for me when it comes to BDSM. I've enjoyed four long Tinder chats with four very different people, each of whom are curious about or have tried D/s and are happy with or are in open relationships. Now I have four dates. Let's see how they go.

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