Monday, 17 June 2013

Review: Gun Oil Stroke 29

The first thing I notice is the funny smell. Quick check of the ingredients...'Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis', which is sweet almond oil. Take note allergy sufferers. Gun Oil Stroke 29 is designed to melt after the 29th 'stroke'. I squirt the thick white cream onto my fingers and then applied it to my, er, gun.

Pumping my weapon I am reminded of the promise that this cream may make me forget I am 'using [my] own hand'. Very not true. There is no denying who's touching who here - this isn't a miracle/numbing cream. Apparently sitting on your hand can provide that particular sensation. 

Back to the matter in hand. This cream is so slippery I can barely grasp the thing. Unfortunately this makes the whole exercise very difficult and much less enjoyable. It's messy, too. The best way to try and enjoy it would be to strip off entirely and keep a towel handy. Bear in mind that once it's on your hands it's hard to get off.

But, sure enough, around the 29th stroke (I wasn't really counting), body heat and friction has caused the cream to melt into baby oil consistency. This provides the one good thing about this cream; nice, smooth strokes free of any painful friction. Oh, I would imagine it's good for the skin too, as it contains aloe vera which will no doubt be vigorously rubbed in.

I ended up having to wipe a lot of the cream off as it greatly hindered what I was trying to achieve. This greasy mess did nothing to enhance the experience. It may be enjoyable to use with a partner as it could then make a decent lube. It could also be a good alternative to baby oil, the initial cream consistency being much easier to transport.

As a masturbation enhancer this cream fails miserably. It detracts from any pleasure, and therefore I would recommend that you avoid this product.

Friday, 14 June 2013

Her toy, their toy

Thursday meant that Jess had the house to herself. Her husband, Ed, was out with his mates at their weekly drinks in a local pub. Jess had, of course, been politely invited to this regular event, but she knew it was Ed's only opportunity to be a lad with his single friends and talk about those things that men only talk about without any presence of the opposite sex. Also, more importantly, Jess could enjoy a few hours of blissful solitude in their new house.

Tonight, as with most nights, she had filled a deep bath with hot lavender-scented water, topped with a thick blanket of bubbles. As she gloried in the steaming water her hand found its way to where the tops of her legs met. A fleeting thought about how she needed to have a bit of a trim down there was interrupted by thoughts of Ed. They had married only last year in a sun-blessed outdoor ceremony. Jess had worn a silk ivory dress that hugged her bum leaving almost nothing to the imagination. The front plunged to reveal her proud cleavage.

Jess was happy with her body. She had been secretly delighted by the barely concealed ogling of Ed's friends on that happy day. Her fingers danced idly over her clit, their water-wrinkled texture providing added exhilaration. For some reason she found herself thinking of Pablo and Tim, the geeky duo in her husband's little band of buddies. They were both very much into IT, but equally adept at presenting themselves immaculately. Their jobs required them both to wear suits and neither spared any expense in the clothes that were draped over their large, trim frames.

She heard the door open then the thud of feet on stairs. A smile spread unbidden across her face at the sound of her tipsy husband casting about in search of her. At last came the timid knock.

"Who is it?" She asked teasingly.
"Erm, Ed." Came his slurred reply, unaware he was being ridiculed.
"Oh, well, never mind. But I suppose you can come in anyway."

Ed's alcohol-addled mind ceased from spinning as soon as he entered. It had been drawn magnetically to his naked wife. His brain and his groin both now had a common goal. 

Jess leaned back and allowed her husband's hand to take over from where hers had just been. His shirt became soaked with water but he either wasn't aware or, most likely, didn't care. Her body was now his to play with and, despite the many drinks he had consumed, he instinctively knew where to touch her.

He squeezed her smooth thighs and delicately ran his fingertips up the inside of them. With his other hand he circled and massaged her breasts, occasionally tweaking her pebbly nipples. The distortion of the water meant that Jess couldn't see what was being done to her below the waist, but this sense of anticipation doubled the pleasure.

At last his attention focused on her parted pussy. Soft sighs of joy slipped from her mouth as he pinched and played with her pearly button. A finger, then two, eased their way inside her. She raised her hips and closed her eyes. His strong hands had complete control. He didn't need to finger fuck her very hard, his movements weren't frenzied. Just the very touch of his fingers on her naked body were enough to bring her quickly to orgasm.
The ripples of water turned to waves of pleasure. Jess gripped the sides of the bath until she could give no more of herself. Ed leaned over and kissed his wife. He unbuttoned and removed his soaking wet shirt as Jess recovered. It was then that she noticed the flowers which he had dropped in the doorway. Flowers and a finger fucking. She began to wonder if Ed had done something wrong.

"Are those for me?" She asked.
"Er, yes." He went and fetched them.
"Thanks Eddie, they're beautiful."
"No problem, I love you."
"So, what?"
"So what did you do? Why all this attention for me?"
"Oh, well...I, er, bought something."

Before she could answer Ed stumbled out of the room. Jess pulled the plug and dried herself. She found Ed on one of the large leather sofas in their capacious lounge. He was holding his iPad.

"So, what did you buy?"
"It was kind of an accident, well, it was Pablo's fault. Have you ever heard of a sybian?"
"Yes, surprisingly, I have." 

Jess had heard about this device when she had been on a recent girls night out. A sybian is a saddle-shaped sex toy that is high enough to be sat on. A dildo can be attached to the top. This, and the top of the saddle, vibrates, giving the woman sitting on it immense pleasure via her G-spot and clit. Jess, however, had no idea why Ed had asked the question, but she could see him preparing to explain.

"We were all getting a bit drunk and I left to go to the toilet. I come back to find the others giggling like little girls and holding my phone. Turns out they bought a sybian on my eBay account. You know how twisted Pablo and Tim can be."
"Are you kidding me?"
"No! I wish I was."
"How much did this thing cost?"
"Just under a grand."
"A thousand pounds?! For fuck sake!"
"It's coming from the States. Plus it would have been cheaper if that shit Tim hadn't added a few extras just before they ordered."
"Ed, that's fucking ridiculous."
"I know, I know. It's expensive alright..."
"It's fucking extortionate."
"What? Oh, well, maybe."
"Your friends can be real twats sometimes Ed. You have to cancel the order."
"Ah, well, it's non-refundable."
"Look, OK, I'll just flog it to someone else when it comes. These things are really popular, it won't take long." Jess just sighed in return.
"Sorry Jess."

She looked into his drunk but genuine eyes and couldn't help but forgive him immediately. He could be an idiot sometimes, but she still loved him immensely. Plus, she was still tingling after his earlier efforts. No-one else could make her feel like that. She kissed him.

"You're forgiven. I love you."
"Thanks Jessie. You never know, you may wanna keep it."
"I don't bloody think so."


The delivery man carried the large box into the house and watched Jess with a smirk as she signed for it. She just ignored him and closed the door whilst avoiding his eyes. This thing was expensive but you certainly got a lot for your money.

Ed was out and she had the house to herself for the day. She busied herself with housework but her mind kept drawing back to the box. Maybe she should open it, just to check it's what they were expecting.

With a kitchen knife she carefully sliced through the tape. Patiently removing the wrapping she could now peer into the box and examine the contents. The big black saddle looked shiny and soft. It smelled of new plastic. Jess hesitated, then quickly closed the cardboard flaps and returned to her domestic drudgery.

It was now a long time past seven and Ed was late back from work again. She decided to entertain herself and satisfy her curiosity. She had to tip the box on its side and wrestle the contents out of it but at last she could see it. The curves, the perfectly located vibrating all looked so tempting. She ran her hands over the sybian, imagining again what it would be like.

Just as she began manoeuvring herself to sit on it the sound of a key in the lock gave her a start. She quickly smoothed down her clothes and leapt on to the couch. Trying to act nonchalant she welcomed her husband home.

"Hi. Oh, you unpacked it then?" He commented.
"Yes, I just wanted to check it was what you ordered before we sell it."
"Did you need to remove everything?"
"Just being thorough."
"Uh huh."
"Anyway, I'll pack it up again tomorrow."
"OK, but if you've changed your mind and want to keep it..."
"Don't be silly, I'll pack it up tomorrow."


This time she decided to sit on it. Whilst it was still unplugged, of course. It felt perfect, the shape of the saddle fitting perfectly between her legs. She was shocked at how much she wanted to try it for real. So shocked that she declared it dangerous and returned to her computer so that she could absorb herself in work for the rest of the day.

A thousand pounds wasn't ridiculously expensive, not really. They could afford it. Plus, it could add some spice to their relationship. Jess finished work early and unpacked the large toy again. She was wearing leggings, and a thong beneath. This time she didn't hesitate. She plugged the sybian in, climbed on and grabbed the remote control.

She hadn't put any attachment on. This was only to be a brief test. The contraption purred gently as she turned the dial onto the lowest setting. Immediately an electric tongue of pleasure entered her body from between her legs and caused her to arch her back involuntarily. She switched it off. My god, that was powerful, and so, so good.

The second time was even better. Jess leaned forward so that the small vibrating crest filled the gap between her legs. Her clit hummed and jolts of delight coursed through her writhing body. This was when she should have stepped off and carried on with her day. Instead she let herself go and allowed the sybian to carry her into ecstasy. 

She was still flushed as she stripped off her leggings and sticky thong, her heart was still racing as the shower sluiced away the evidence of her orgasm. That contraption was incredible. It was also dangerously addictive and her mind was buzzing, occupied with how she would use it next time. Obviously she would have to try it naked, obviously she would have to try and persuade Ed to keep it without losing face.


"So you don't think we can sell it?"
"No, I had a go at selling it on eBay but was warned that such things could only be sold if they were still in their wrapping."
"Shit, I can't believe I'm going to lose so much money."
"I'm sorry Ed."
"Is there no other way we can sell it?"
"No, I don't think so."
"Don't worry, we can easily afford it."
"Yes, I know we can. But there are much better ways I could have spent nine hundred quid."

Jess replayed the conversation from earlier in her mind. She felt more than a little guilty about what she had done, but at the same time realised it was Ed's fault that they had the damned thing in the first place. Yes, now they were even. And now she had the most wonderful toy ever.

She had worked through lunch and then returned home early. A storm was refusing to move away and rain drilled against the windows. Ed was out with his friends and so Jess had the house, and the sybian, all to herself.

This time she decided not to rush things. She took the toy out of its box and placed it in the middle of the lounge. The coffee table had been pushed to the side and so there was plenty of space. It felt so naughty, taking her clothes off here. She and Ed had fucked on the sofa a couple of years back, but being alone, stripping off slowly, made her feel strangely exposed.

When she had nothing left to remove she turned off all the lights except for a small table lamp. In the dimmed room she straddled the sybian and allowed herself to get used to the cool feel of it on her bare skin. This time, when she slowly began rotating the dial, her body knew what to expect and so there was no shock, just gentle enjoyment.

Ed, Pablo, Tim and the fourth member of their group, Kyle, had decided against a visit to the pub. On this dark and dreary night they didn't want to have to venture too far. The rain pounded on their heads and shoulders as Tim slipped the key into the lock. As soon as the door opened Ed switched on the porch light. He then heard a strange sound and signalled to his mates to be quiet.

Immediately alert they all hushed and crept slowly in. Ed tried to concentrate on where the sound was coming from but the heavy rain made it impossible to zone in on it. With his friends behind him he tiptoed along the corridor then noticed a low light coming through the open lounge door. He, and the others, approached slowly.

Jess was in the throes of pure delight. The sybian burred noisily but she wasn't bothered. The noise of the rain drowned it out. Besides, right now she couldn't care less. The pressure of her body forced her pussy hard onto the vibrating pad and there was no other feeling quite like it. She was gasping and moaning and riding the black saddle like a jockey nearing the finish line. Her cute bum was pointing towards the door behind her, her boobs thrust out between her arms and her eyes closed and swimming with flashes of passion.

Ed and the other men stared open-mouthed. Jess's long brown hair danced over her small, smooth back. Her shadow betrayed the erect nipples atop her bouncing breasts. The silken globes of her buttocks, so utterly perfect, clenching and spreading as she rode the sybian. Occasional flashes of her tight, inviting anus driving the voyeurs wild.

After a few minutes of staring Ed managed to pull himself together. Jess would be horrified if she knew they were watching and so he quietly ushered his friends away. They reluctantly departed the fantastical scene and decided that a stiff drink down the pub maybe wasn't such a bad idea after all.


"Kudos, my friend kudos."

The four of them clinked glasses and sipped at the whiskey. They had been in the pub for an hour and only now had broached the subject of what they had witnessed earlier.

"You truly are a lucky bastard Ed."
"I am aren't I? Didn't know she had it in her to be honest."
"Not sure it was in her, mate, but there's an attachment for that." Ed responded by punching Pablo lightly on his arm.
"Seriously, though, what would you do without us? If we hadn't got you that thing you'd have never had your marriage spiced up."
"Oh right, cos that's what you nicked my phone for."

Tim went to fetch another round. When he returned the conversation continued.

"Well she certainly seemed to be enjoying it."
"She wasn't the only one."
"Yeah, you should be thanking us Ed. You owe us one."
"Oh do I? Well thanks to you fuckers I'm down almost a grand."
"No worries mate, you can thank us by letting us have another look at your missus."
"Great idea Tim, after all, we are the experts in sex toy purchasing."
"And, once again, if it wasn't for us you wouldn't be in this happy situation."
"Dirty bastards." Responded Ed.

But he did briefly consider it. It was probably the effects of the alcohol, but he was secretly excited by the idea of his mates all enjoying his naked wife. She would never go for it, of course. But then again, he had seen a completely different side to her this evening.

Jess wiped herself and the sybian down then dressed in a fluffy dressing gown. She walked to the kitchen and drank down almost a full pint of water. Her knees were shaky from being on the toy for so long, but her mouth was stretched into a wide grin. Wow. As she walked back to the living room she noticed the light at the end of the corridor.

The porch light was on. She hadn't left it on. Oh god, Ed. He must have come back. She looked down and noticed the muddy footprints. Oh no, no no no no no. Not just Ed. Oh shit, had they all seen her? Of course they fucking had. Shit shit shit. Pablo and Tim and probably Kyle too, all looking at her naked body.

She went and collapsed on the sofa. She didn't bother putting the toy away. Four men watching her bare bum writhe around on that thing. Probably enjoying the view too. Three guys and her husband who had been given a glimpse of her unclothed self. Before she could understand how that made her feel she heard the door being noisily opened, then Ed deliberately walking loudly down the corridor.

"Oh hi sweetness." Jess just looked at him then folded her arms.
"What now?" He asked, wary of the dark look on her face.
"You know what." She sulkily replied.
"No? Tell me?"
"You saw me on that thing."
"Really? No! You've had a go?"
"You know I have Ed. You left the porch light on."
"Oh. Shit."
"So, did you enjoy yourselves?"
"No. Well yes, we did, but we only watched for a couple of minutes."

Jess didn't reply. She stood and went to the bedroom, pretending to be upset. But the grin had returned to her face.


The sybian became a treat for her. If she allowed herself she would be on it every day, but then she would find herself craving the feel of a real cock inside her and the touch of her man. When she did use it she quickly overcame any shyness that came from doing so in front of Ed. In fact his gaze added to the pleasure. He also occasionally stroked her back, arse and breasts, if he wasn't playing with himself.

Ed had bought her a new attachment. This new addition was a a flesh coloured rubber dildo that stood perfectly erect on top of the saddle. Jess had applied generous slatherings of lube and gently eased herself on to it. The vibrating pad on her clit and the buzzing dildo teasing her G-spot brought entirely new levels of enjoyment. As she rode the toy she treated her husband to a blowjob as a thank you for the present.

On this particular evening Ed had moved the coffee table out of the way. In the middle of the room, on a soft Persian rug, the sybian sat awaiting its rider. The overhead light had been switched off and the two lamps in the room angled as if to spotlight the large toy. Jess lay on the couch dressed in a tight black silk slip and wearing a pair of black high heels. Her head rested on her husbands lap, the two of them drinking wine and chatting casually.

There came a knocking on the door. Jess stood, took another large gulp of wine, then went to the door, Ed watching the playful dance of her buttocks as she went. When she opened it she greeted Pablo, Tim and Kyle who were waiting eagerly outside.

"Hi Jess." 
"Come in boys."

They followed her into the corridor. Without warning she stopped with her back still to them. She deftly slid off the shoulder straps of her slip and slowly pulled it down. It stretched over her full breasts and over her curvaceous bum. She bent over to hook it over her feet. Standing entirely naked she looked back over her shoulder and beckoned the gawking men into the lounge.

As soon as she entered she went and sat in Ed's lap, asserting his ownership of her. The others shuffled in and Ed pointed to the side table which bristled with wine and beer.

"Alright fellas? Help yourselves."

They quietly opened bottles of beer then returned their gaze to Jess. For the first time they could see her breasts. They fell from her neck and rose steeply, twin mountains peaked by small areolas and aroused dusky nipples. They could see her flat stomach, the base of which pointed down, the obliques seemingly indicating that the highlight was just below.

"So, I understand you enjoyed my little performance the other night?" Asked Jess.
"Uh huh."
"Yep." The men replied, haltingly.
"Seriously boys, there's no need to be shy. I'm the one who's naked after all."

They laughed and the tension eased slightly. The sexual tension was still set at maximum. The three friends all sat on the other sofa, which faced the sybian. The toy sat there, ignored for now but very much the big, black elephant in the room.

Ed made Jess stand and turn to give his friends a better look at her. Their eyes concentrated on that divine meeting place of her thighs, where the fleshy triangle of her pussy was divided by the line of her lips and the glistening treasure within. Above, a small strip of pubic hair completed the symmetry. They made occasional flatteries about her body. Their lust was total.

"Kyle, can you pass me that bottle of lube?"

He picked up the bottle of viscous gel and handed it to her. She squirted some on her hands and proceeded to spread it over the dildo, which stood perfectly vertical on the sybian. Then she handed the bottle to Ed, turned and bent over, presenting her gaping pussy to him.

His fingers slowly circled her luscious pink cunt, leaving behind a trail of lube. Now his middle finger gently penetrated the soft folds and delved into her. Jess responded by arching her back and offering more of herself to him. When he was done she sashayed to the sybian and stood with one leg either side, her pussy poised above the pointing rubber cock.

Inch by inch she crouched down, guiding the dildo inside her until she was on her knees and her pussy had entirely consumed it. Now she simply looked at Ed. in his hand he held the remote control. Looking back into his wife's eyes he turned the dial onto the first notch. Conversation stopped, the only sound in the room was the thrum of the toy and soft gasps escaping from the naked woman's mouth.

The men overcame their shyness and grew boisterous. Ed had his cock in his hand, gently playing with himself. Soon the others were doing the same. They remained seated but chatted every now and then about what they were seeing. After 20 minutes of this Tim announced he had a surprise. 

Ed switched off the sybian and Jess watched the besuited Tim stand and approach her. From his grey suit trouser pocket he withdrew a small, elongated object.

"When you invited us here there was something that I remembered seeing." Tim said.
"What do you have there Tim?" Asked Ed.
"It's an anal attachment. I just thought Jess may want to try it. Plus, you know, I'm kind of curious."

Ed went to his friend who handed him the fleshy rubber. Ed clapped a hand on Tim's shoulder then helped Jess stand. She was shaky having already orgasmed once. He held the anal toy up for her to see. When he saw her suppress a grin he set about slicking the rubber with lube before adding it to the array on top of the sybian. He also asked his wife to bend over and, when she had done so, applied a dab of lube into and around the tight asterisk of her bum. As she waited for Ed to finish she turned her head and looked at Tim. He smiled and continued to play with himself.

This time, as Jess lowered herself onto the saddle, Ed helped her insert the two protrusions. The new addition felt cold inside her, however, when it began warming up, it made her feel strangely complete. Her body had now been almost entirely penetrated by buzzing rubber. Her synapses were fused with contentment.

The men took it in turns to hold the controls, and therefore have power over their naked toy. She responded like a puppet each time they turned the dial, as if their fingers were directly touching her pussy. They played with themselves, and her, for almost an hour, enjoying the command they had of this beautiful nymph. All of the men were hugely turned on by the feel of gooey rubber against her dilated rings of flesh. Kyle declared himself almost ready. 

"Come here big boy." Said Jess.

He went over to her. She took hold of his penis and wanked him until a huge load of cum splashed onto her tits. Now Pablo approached and she took him into her hands. 

"Oh fuck I'm gonna cum." Screamed Jess and furiously pumped the man's cock.
"Me too, me too. Oh fuck, oh yeah, oh yeahhhh." Her breasts were now slick with ooze.

Jess leaned back further and came for the second time that evening. Tim now stood before her and Jess enjoyed a moment of clarity. Four men, four cocks perfectly erect all because of her. As she enjoyed these thoughts, warm, thick juice spurted from Tim's cock. Cum dripped from her tits and down onto her stomach.

Suddenly someone set the sybian onto its most powerful level. The three friends held onto her shoulders so that she couldn't escape the all-consuming gratification. She took Ed's cock into her mouth and sucked and licked him lustily. He hardened and throbbed and filled her with mouthfuls of pleasure. She responded with the most blissful orgasm yet, revelling in the feel of four pairs of loving hands stroking her and sharing her joy.

She kissed them all goodbye. Her bare, wiped-clean breasts brushing against the silk material of their suits. An unspoken agreement had been made. She was now their fuck toy, for them to enjoy whenever Ed allowed. The sybian was here to stay.

Wednesday, 12 June 2013

Going it alone

I don't like 'from the heart' posts. Blogs, I find, are rather impersonal and, although I try, talking to you here is not in any way how I would talk to you in person. But let's give this a go anyway.

G and I have been married now for two years, we have been in a relationship for much longer. Our wedding was not conventional and our relationship clearly isn't so either. I love her, more so every day. Our plans of sharing everything and everyone have, however, faltered. She is wary of enjoying a kink lifestyle in the city where she lives, where there is a small, tiny risk of running into someone she knows whilst only wearing a thong. Our public kink will have to be limited to overnight trips out of town.

So, she is letting go of my leash and pushing me alone into the big kinky world with a slap on my bum. We will still be married, live together and love each other as much as we ever did. It's just that this is something I will be doing by myself, having been greatly encouraged by the wonderful people I have met. There will continue to be no secrets and, of course, time with G always comes first. Should she ever change her mind then I will be returning myself to her and her alone.

Now, time to adjust some profiles. Opinions, and guidance, would be most welcome.

Wednesday, 5 June 2013

The Chase - Erotic comic

Something new for the Love and Lust in London Erotic comic. This particular story is on the theme of 'party', in three interpretations of the word - an enjoyable event, a collection of people and being a participant. Why this theme? You'll have to read to the end to find out!

Many congratulations to Rebel on the first year anniversary of Wicked Wednesday, which this week is based around the theme of 'Party'. To see who else is joining in see here:

Wicked Wednesday... be inspired & share...