Monday, 27 July 2015

Naked men - yuck or yum?

I recently read an article which states that women do not find naked men arousing (Male nudity does not cause female sexual arousal). This statement is both interesting and depressing at the same time. I also find it extremely presumptive and a little hard to believe.

One of the conclusions is that women do not use images of naked men to get into a state of arousal and that it is only men who use nudity as a sexual turn-on. Being male I have no qualification for knowing precisely what females think when seeing a man naked. At the same time, I have been in the presence of women who became aroused by my nudity. Am I to assume they were all doing this for show? G does a very good job of sounding convincing when she asks me to strip for her.

Clearly I was wrong. Clearly I should stop taking pictures of myself as there, apparently, is no interest out there (apart from those nudity-loving men). Or maybe it is articles like this that get in the way of empowering women. Perhaps, instead, we should be celebrating articles and blogs that celebrate the female gaze rather than denying it exists.

Whilst celebrating, we should also note that this gaze may differ from the male gaze - close ups of cocks are not likely to be welcome (see this post from the ever-excellent Girl on the Net). Following the recent Magic Mike XXL film numerous articles were written about the rise of the female gaze and how this gaze took in the whole body, not just a focus on cocks.

With this evidence and much, much more, I'm not buying into the premise that the male body is not sexually arousing. So...take it off or leave it on?

Sunday, 26 July 2015

Getting roped in

Several months ago I wrote about my first forays into rope bondage (Tying her to perfection). I feel now as if I've dipped a toe into the rabbit hole of this particular art.

I now feel somewhat proficient at the few ties I've learned. I'm therefore starting to discover more ties and different techniques. I'm taking into consideration ties which, when I'm ready, can be used as part of suspension bondage.

In October we're travelling to Japan, where kinbaku (a form of rope bondage) originated. I've started taking a look at whether it's possible to meet up with any rope practitioners. In the meantime, I've some dates coming up with whom I hope to further hone my technique.

Sunday, 12 July 2015

Giving up control

I have been living the life of a Dom for what feels like quite some time now. Over time I have discovered just how much of an art it is. It involves some expertise in psychology, anatomy, social skills and even fashion. Then there's further studies such as rope bondage - an intricate art by itself and one which I'm learning ever more about.

Though I would not consider myself a master Master (nor would I ever as I expect that the learning will never stop) I seem to have gone a long way down the road of being a Dom. Why, then, does that tiny little sub side of me refuse to go away?

My sub days, I thought, were long behind me. As I grew older I expected to become pure Dom. Some days, though, I meet people with whom I could, just about, imagine giving over control to. 

To not have to think, to be told what to do, to contribute only my body to the enjoyment of the evening, these are the things I very occasionally miss.