Sunday, 31 January 2016

Fact finding (and hiding)

Not many people in my life know that I write erotica. To be honest, I'd be slightly embarrassed if my family knew - it would just raise too many questions that I'd really rather not answer. Besides, I'm an amateur so no one but a select few really needs to know.

In the course of researching a story I often discover some facts, some interesting, some rather bland. For example, I now know a few things about netball thanks to a story I'm currently working on. My mind has a way of storing useless facts.

"There's seven players on a netball team." I may blurt out at a pub quiz. All eyes would then turn to me along with the inevitable "How the hell do you know that?" and that's when my mind really needs to work hard on coming up with some innocent reason. It can be tough being a secret amateur erotica writer.

Sunday, 24 January 2016


These are most of my ingredients for a night of delightful D/s, the ropes still tangled after doing their job of securing a very sexy sub to a chair and then a bed.

See the very best in sex blogging on this Sinful Sunday:

Sinful Sunday

Sunday, 17 January 2016

Still life for erotica writers

This seems such an obvious idea I would be surprised if it hadn't been thought of before. Perhaps it's because my way of thinking comes with a large side dish of kink.

Still life sessions are important for any artist who studies the human form. Erotica writers study the human form with their words. In addition to this, erotica writers explore how humans interact with each other and how their bodies react to sexual stimulation.

Imagine, then, a room in which someone was naked and masturbating, or a couple were engaging in foreplay and then sex, or a Dom was tying up and playing with a naked sub. At the periphery of the room a group of writers describing what they see on paper, having the opportunity and luxury of seeing human interaction rather than trying to imagine it.

Still life for erotica writers (although the 'life' wouldn't be that 'still'). Getting up close and studying foreplay, penetration and orgasm. Why has no one set this up yet?!

Saturday, 9 January 2016

Show me how you masturbate

"Show me how you masturbate" is an instruction which I have, on occasion, given to others. Everyone seems to have their favourite method, here's mine:

Gripping at the base is certainly stimulating, but it is a very slow method of bringing on any excitement and I've never orgasmed in this way.

I may employ the double-handed method if putting on a performance, letting my hand wander from cock to balls, but it's definitely more for show than for instant pleasure.

Being uncircumcised I find it uncomfortable, even painful at times, if the foreskin is pulled back from the head too far.

After years of rigorous and vigorous practice, this is what I've found works for me. A firm grip with forefinger and thumb just below the base of the head with fast rhythmic movements. Letting the hardness dissipate every now and then enhances the experience. Here's a side view:

Here's to many more years of practice, with some occasional assistance. I do hope you've been taking notes. 

Friday, 1 January 2016

Blogiversary #4

This blog was begun 4 years ago after my wife and I read an article about sex parties and realised they were more common than I had previously thought. The original intention of the blog was to explore these sex parties with my wife (who I refer to as 'G'). Since then she decided that she wanted me to explore on my own.

2015 has been a year of discovery and realisations. I've realised that sex parties, such as Killing Kittens, are likely to be full of vain people who are more interested in preening and attracting attention rather than exploring each others' bodies. I've realised that a blog written by a married man in an open relationship and into D/s BDSM is not a particularly popular subject (not surprising as it is very niche and many must find it hard to relate).

I've discovered sex clubs and that some can be incredible and some can be pure sleaze. I've explored the bodies and minds of several incredible subs and, in so doing, have further discovered my own body and mind. I've discovered that socialising with kinky people can be most enjoyable even when clothes remain on.

I hope that 2016 will bring more of the same. I'm most of the way through my second erotica book and once that's done will focus more on writing about my explorations as well as going back to writing more short stories.

I've had only positive comments on and about my blog in the past year. Even though there may not be many of you, I'm very grateful for your lovely words and company here. Here's to another year of honesty, sex positivity and adventure.