Wednesday, 31 October 2018

Erotica is for women?

Using a very unscientific count of the (traditionally) female names which make up the Amazon most-read erotica authors, I estimate that around 88% of authors in this genre identify as female (some may be men using a female name - there may be myriad other reasons for why 88% is inaccurate). The Romance Writers of America estimates that 84% of romance book buyers are female.

Why? What is it about written erotica that appeals mainly to women and has so few male authors? I can think of one key reason.

When I was young and only just starting to discover my sexuality I found a copy of Delta of Venus by Anais Nin on my parents' bookshelf. Reading those erotically charged words put the most wondrous images into my head - images which have stayed with me many years later.

Then I gained access to internet porn. Suddenly I didn't have to use my imagination; scenes seemingly designed just for me could be viewed at a click. Real-life people performing x-rated acts, and all for the male gaze.

Thankfully there are now many more female porn producers (including Anna Richards at Frolicme and Shine Louise Houston at Pink Label), but this industry is still almost overwhelmingly male-oriented. Whilst I cannot wait for the day when porn is more balanced, I imagine that many women get a more satisfactory erotic fix from within the pages of books.

It's not easy writing from the perspective of another gender, therefore it stands to reason that successful erotica authors tend to be women who can better connect with their audience. There is also an unfair stigma that comes from watching porn. Society still sees it as a dirty, unhealthy act (you only need look at the UK government's attempts to introduce obscenity and prudish 'child safety' laws for proof of this), whereas reading a book is somehow more wholesome. Whilst men can get away with being openly sexual, women suffer from being shamed if they act in the same way.

You may have noticed that I've steered clear of stating views such as "women prefer a storyline" or "men are more visual". That's because I don't believe such views to be true. Society may have shaped us to behave in certain ways or like different things based on our gender, but there are plenty of men who want character backgrounds and plenty of women who appreciate more explicit, x-rated content.

So why are we still in this situation? Well, take a look around you. Those Victorian attitudes of pure women haven't gone far away. We still hold women up to be objectified and encourage men to be the objectifiers. Although I've mentioned how I see signs of change, they are small signs and change is slow.

This is how I think we as individuals can help to speed up that change:

- Buy female-produced porn
- Challenge yourself to try something different;
    - Embrace storylines
    - Read erotica authored by another gender
- Don't be afraid to healthily objectify men
- Don't objectify women unless they want to be objectified!
- Read sex blogs by women to gain an insight into how they feel about this topic/realise you're not alone in thinking this way
- Read Delta of Venus

OK, that last one was just a book recommendation. But, seriously, I'd love it if all men could read that book and realise that storylines are sexy, as well as to gain an insight into how sexual women's minds can be.

Disagree? Agree? Anything to add? I may have got it wrong and try to be open-minded so please do comment below and help to guide me/others.

Saturday, 27 October 2018

#SOSS October 27

There is such a plethora of talent out there that this Share Our Shit Saturday post overfloweth and still misses out on some incredible content (I'm aware that I've once again neglected to share enough cis male and LGBTQ content). Enjoy:

Molly Moore (@mollysdailykiss) - Picture-month 
Molly is one of the true greats of erotic photography and I really would be disappointed if her work isn't hanging in a gallery besides other famous photographers in years to come. Her outdoor pictures are always particularly delectable, this photo being no exception.

Nell Egremont (@nellegremont) - Violence and kindness in Seven Acts (trigger warning) 
This piece of writing was incredible in so many ways. It's content was often devastating, it's structure was so creative and captivating, it's message was delivered with such raw intensity.

Hannah Lockhardt (@HannahLockhardt) - The Chair 
Anything written by Hannah is worth setting aside some time to thoroughly enjoy. Although I don't believe that Femdom is a subject she often writes about, this short story oozes female power over a very sorry and sexy man.

Violet Fawkes (@fireandhoney) - Marks 
Violet is such a talented writer that, in the simple act of reading this story, you suddenly find yourself in the same room as her characters, watching them play out their delicious story. Such a hot twist too.

EA Unadorned (@EA_unadorned) - White Gloves 
That so much hotness can be fitted in to such a short story is testament to EA's magnificent writing skills. If you like Femdom you are going to absolutely love this.

This incredible challenge has, from the very beginning, brought together a treasure trove of magnificent smut. Just a handful of talented authors remain, their sexy words competing against one another. Kudos to Rebel for creating such an engaging competition and, whilst I wholeheartedly advocate paying your artists, that all this marvellous content is free is something you should appreciate.

Blog posts
The Other Livvy (@theotherlivvy) - Realism... 
Any blog posts which gets me thinking about how I write (or how I approach kink) fills me with gratitude towards the author. Livvy poses some excellent questions here on whether or not erotic stories need to be realistic so as to engage the audience. To a certain extent I think they do, but if a story is written well enough then the situation can be fantastical but the reader can still imagine themselves in it.

On Queer Street (@OnQueerStreet) - Vagina, vag-OWW-NO (trigger warning) 
As a penis owner it can be a challenge better understanding how vagina owners experience their bodies. Quinn does a truly excellent job here of helping me do just that. This blog post also reiterated the point that sex is so much more than penetrative actions. I also really, really like Quinn's logo!

Cara Thereon (@thereon_cara) - Savor each visit 
A post about being in a long-distance relationship and the excitement, thoughts and concerns experienced in the build-up to a visit. Cara's experience resonated so much - even though I haven't been in a truly LDR I don't see other partners very often and so there's always a frisson of anticipation - good and bad (mostly good) - just before we reunite. Cara describes this perfectly.

Thursday, 25 October 2018


A short piece of Femdom erotica for your delectation.


We were educated at an all-girls catholic school, so you'd expect one of us to be kinky as hell. Sure enough, here was Elle with a hunk of man who was naked but for a thick metal collar, chain leash and some sort of device on his cock.

"What is that?" Lorena asked.
"Cock cage," Elle answered, "he's locked in that unless I want to play with him."
"Brilliant!" came the delighted reply.

I just sat there and gawped. Elle's boyfriend stood with his hands behind his back, his biceps and muscular chest revealing his power. I have a thing for men's thighs and he was a perfect specimen.

"Turn," Elle said.
"Oh!" I gasped when he obeyed.

OK, I also have a thing for men's butts. Here were the most toned, taut pair of manly buns I'd ever seen. Yum. When Elle had offered to introduce us to her man-slave I'd no idea we'd be in for such a treat. I then spotted a mark at the top of his left cheek.

"What is that? Is that a tattoo of your initials?!" I exclaimed.
"Yep, gotta let others know who he belongs to," Elle said, "Tonight, though, he belongs to us all. OK, male, get to work."

That Elle called her boyfriend 'male' amused me greatly. She spanked him so hard on the tattooed buttock I flinched. He turned and got to his knees. Elle had suggested to Lorena and I that we'd find this evening considerably more enjoyable if we wore skirts. I was now beginning to understand why. Such a generous, sharing friend.

To remove any doubt of what would happen next in this evening's proceedings, Elle spread her legs wide and the male crawled between them. Almost immediately she gasped in delight.

"I've trained him well," she assured us, "give him five minutes and I guarantee satisfaction."

Lorena and I were entertained by the sight of the male's busy head under Elle's skirt and his gorgeous rear pointing upwards as he got to work. So, she has him waxed, I thought. We also had a better view of the chastity device and how it restrained his manhood.

My turn. I enthusiastically spread my legs wide and a very flushed-looking Elle instructed the male to get to work. I was still wearing underwear but this didn't deter his busy tongue. There was something about it pressing through the fabric which doubled the sensation. I did, however, miss that slithery wet sensation and so slid my hands under my waistband so as to pull the panties aside.

As often happens in these situations my mind began to turn on itself. I hadn't showered, what did I taste like, he must be uncomfortable between my chubby thighs. But as soon as these thoughts arrived I banished them. He was merely male. Elle had trained him to unthinkingly serve our cunts and I should enjoy this utility.

Conversation continued between us. We chatted about our jobs and the weather whilst the male orally pleasured me, occasionally interrupting our chat with instructions; "I took my handsome junior assistant to lunch and...go deeper with your tongue, mmmmph, like that...and told him to get his act together".

Elle had claimed I'd be orgasming within five minutes. After three I was finding it hard to focus on what my friends were saying. After four I was gripping the cushions hard and momentarily allowing the male to tear me away from what was being said as his talented tongue shot a fusillade of purest pleasure through my body.

"Done?" Elle asked with a grin when she noticed my eyes were closed.
"Done," I confirmed.

The male was taken by his leash to under Lorena's skirt. I stared at his exposed hole as we chatted. How nice it would be to fondle him there. I was, however, worried about how he was straining against his cage and wanted to free him from chastity.

Lorena was clearly being transported to a very sexy place; her participation in our conversation had reduced greatly. I, too, was still finding it difficult to concentrate, distracted as I was by that servile cock, entrapped balls and gaping pink O. Once the male emerged from a very satisfied-looking Lorena his owner fetched him and made him stand once more before us.

"I don't often get him out, but I can see you're both curious," Elle said.
"Seems a shame to not see his best bit," I replied. Fine, I'm a fan of cocks too.

Elle produced a key and made the male bend over so that she could unlock the cage. He was released from the contraption, the metal hoops leaving indentations where his erection had pressed against them. It was fun to see that he'd enjoyed his task.

"Present!" Elle ordered.

The male widened his stance and held his hands behind his back. Elle swatted him on his butt then fetched some snacks and more wine from the kitchen. We resumed our conversation, enjoying the view and coming down from our orgasms. I couldn't resist holding his warm, thick dick as we chatted - taking my time to admire him there, rather than the rushed glance I was usually afforded from horny men.

As the evening wore on we occasionally spread our legs and set the male to work on us. He was spectacularly talented and his delicious cock made for a hugely erotic canvas on which we painted vivid ecstasy with our orgasm-enriched eyes. Three of us ended the evening having been thoroughly satisfied. The male was locked up again, his purpose served until next time.

Sunday, 21 October 2018

No need to share, yet

Kink and non-monogamy seems to run through my veins. I don't consider the BDSM enthusiast side of me to be a whole different person - whilst I don't live my life as a full-time 24/7 kinkster, that part of me is always there.

Where this side of me does stay put away is when I'm with family, or with friends who don't know that I'm into kink. Why? Because kink isn't such a large part of me that it will cross over into other areas of my life. My relationships with others aren't deep enough that I feel the need to introduce other partners to my friends and family.

There may come a day when I do find myself in a deeper poly relationship. This situation would only come about with G's explicit agreement. Should that happen then it would be time to introduce my non-monogamous life to others, although I would still probably hold back the kinkier details.

Monday, 15 October 2018

One-bar cage

An October storm, almost supernatural in power, raged through the forest and tore at the stately wood lodge. Built to withstand such forces, it stood firm. Only the creak of the straining structure, the timpani of thunder and the snare of rain sounded in Chloe's ears. Her voyeurs focused on her silently.

Her punishment was well-deserved. It was also optional. His style of domination always allowed her to make choices. She knew that, by agreeing with his decision, she would improve in her submissiveness. She also enjoyed surrendering to the whims of his imagination.

Low lamplight glinted off the metal cuffs around her wrists and ankles. A short chain trailed from her steel collar to an iron ring in the floor, forcing her to bend at the waist. This was all part of her punishment, as was her being displayed naked for the other Doms gathered about the room, all acquaintances of her Master.

A key element of the punishment was the solid steel bar secured to the floor between her legs. It had a long, flared top which was currently only partly visible. The bulk of it was buried deep in her cunt. This, combined with the other bondage accoutrements, held her firmly in place. A one-bar cage holding her captive and vulnerable for all the men to see.

Those men were seated in comfortable leather armchairs arranged in a semi-circle around her, all of them in shadow. Directly behind her were patio doors displaying the lightning-strobed night beyond the glass. Above the cacophony of the storm she heard ice in whisky-filled tumblers. Freedom was within her grasp; this was where the game began. 

In front of her mouth a small plastic tube had been secured. It ran behind her into a tub of water. The base of the tub was at waist height and, floating at the top of the water; a tennis ball. String was tied around the ball and draped outside of the bucket. A small key, resting on the floor, was held in a knot at the other end of the string. 

The more water Chloe drank, the lower the tennis ball would sink and the higher the key would be pulled. If she drank all the water the key would be within her grasp. She could then unlock the cuffs, which would allow her to reach down for another key for the collar and yet another for the steel bar.

Lube, which had been generously applied to the metal dildo, slid down her voluminous thighs and was now joined by the urine she had so desperately tried to hold back. But, forced to drink so much water during the past two hours, she had no choice but to humiliate herself in front of the Doms. 

How many of their subs had been in this same situation? she wondered. Would I ever find myself here again? One of the men opened the doors behind her, inviting in the storm. Immediately she was soaked with rain, the water sluicing the various liquids from her body, onto the floor and out into the night. Amidst the tempest she slid further down onto the dildo. Added to the stimulation of being enjoyed by the men, this tiny action was enough to send her into ecstatic abandon.

The doors were closed again and her damp, bare skin was left to dry in the warmth. Her disobedient orgasm had gone unnoticed. She sucked and sucked. Now the key was in her hand, now she slotted it into the hole, now she turned it and released her hands. The ankle cuffs soon followed, then she was unlocking the steel bar. It slid down, emerging slowly and slickly from her delighted cunt.

"Expose!" her Master ordered.

She got to her knees, spread her legs and clasped her hands behind her head. It was time for her reward. A vibrator was held at the parting of her lips, delicately thrumming against her clit. The men took it in turns to stand before her, unbutton their flies and masturbate. Soon she was drenched with the cream of their lust, each splash of cum taking her closer to her own zenith.

"Good little cum slut," He said, before giving her permission to finger herself to ecstasy.

One hand grasped tightly around the vibrator whilst the other sought out her depths. She pressed the toy harder between her labia. A darkness as black as the tempestuous night shrouded her eyes then burst into electrifying light - an orgasm so intense she felt herself rising above the room then slamming back into her pulsating body, waves of pure bliss radiating from her exposed genitals. Sated, she opened her eyes and grinned at the men looking benevolently down at her.


This story was written as part of Wicked Wednesday. Click below to see the work of incredibly talented folk:

Wicked Wednesday... a place to be wickedly sexy or sexily wicked

Saturday, 13 October 2018

Who I am

I love travel, adventure and exploring the world, and I love kink and exploring our bodies. This picture, taken high up in a remote part of the Andes, illustrates both of these passions of mine.

See who else is taking part in Sinful Sunday:
Sinful Sunday

Friday, 12 October 2018

Subtle chemistry

I've become increasingly aware of my tendencies to switch. I started out in kink as submissive, became almost totally dominant over the years but now feel as though there may be more of a balance, even though I have fewer opportunities to explore the sub side.

There's an important factor which dictates if I'll be playing as a sub or Dom; the person I'm with. It doesn't matter how they're dressed, the shape of their body nor what they do for a living. It's a subtle chemistry, a few meaningful words, the way in which they act towards me. 

When I chat with a certain someone in a private Twitter DM, or with my sub on WhatsApp, the perfectly ordinary conversations aren't infused with orders or obedience. But if one of us could step through that screen there would be little doubt as to who would be putting on the collar and leash.

Whilst I remain mostly Dom, if I do find that there's an essence of dominance in another then I would be more than willing to help that person explore that side of them. It is, however, important for me to let them discover their submissiveness or dominance for themselves, I wouldn't ever suggest that someone comes across as one or the other - that would be incredibly presumptive on my part.

Of course, for whatever reason, it isn't always possible to get this feeling towards another person. I also doubt that I often get it right on wher they fall on the Dom/sub spectrum. But when it seems obvious, and when they do reveal themselves to be one or the other, then a mundane conversation can seem so wonderfully infused with a sense of D/s.

Tuesday, 2 October 2018

Touch, but don't look

Amber let go a brief, uncertain laugh.

"Wait, are you serious?" she asked.
"Perfectly. I know how much you want this. We're your friends - close enough, I'm sure, that this won't affect our relationship. What do you think Greg?"
"Sure, as long as we agree that this'll be like when we tried that cheap tequila; a meaningless experiment that we'll probably never do again," Greg said.
"Except this won't give us a horrendous hangover," Amber added, still smiling.

They were sat together on a deep sofa. Leo had suggested this idea in response to Amber's constant chardonnay-fuelled whining about her boring ex, who never experimented with sex. He slapped his thighs and stood.

"Wait," Amber said, "I'm not sure I'm ready for you guys to see me naked."
"Hmm, good point," added Greg, "I definitely don't wanna see Leo's dick."
"I'll have you know it's a very fine dick," Leo said.

Proceedings were momentarily halted and it seemed as though this little experiment wouldn't go ahead after all. But then Amber had an idea. She went to her room and returned with a couple of her silk scarves.

"Blindfolds!" she exclaimed, "this way we get to have all the fun but without any awkwardness."
"OK, but don't you get one?"
"Well, no, someone's gotta do the steering."

 Leo and Greg looked at each other and nodded. They tied the scarves over their eyes.

"So...what now?"
"In the porn vids I've seen - and yes, girls watch porn - a good threesome always starts with a blowjob," said Amber, "and remember: touch, but don't look."

Greg stood, then unbuttoned his fly and pushed down his boxer shorts until his manhood was revealed. Amber's mischievous smile widened and she leaned forward to consume her friend. Now Leo revealed himself and Amber gleefully added him to her already full mouth.

"Damn, you're fucking good at that," Greg sighed.
"She really...has a talent...doesn't she," Leo agreed between ecstatic gasps.

This feedback resulted in a doubling of her efforts. Sucking on two cocks would have more than fulfilled her fantasies, but Greg now moved them all on to the next step. Amber helped him to remove her jeans and allowed him to lift off her blouse, unclasp her bra and slip off her panties.

"Your arse feels gorgeous Amb," her friend complimented.
"Magnificent tits too," the other added, "let's see how she tastes."

Amber felt wonderfully naked and repositioned herself to give her friend easy access. His first lick sent an electric shudder through her. She couldn't quite believe she was actually having a threesome, with her two handsome friends! The sensation was given added piquancy by the boys using their hands to feel their way around her body.

Slurps and joyous moans escaped Leo's mouth as he feasted on her. Sighs and masculine grunts issued from Greg's mouth as Amber feasted on him. She heard the man at her rear pull on a condom then felt him ease into her. The cock seemed to know exactly where to go and slid slowly into her cunt, teasing that ultra-sensitive part just inside.

"Nnngh, fuck that feels good," Amber uttered.

Leo's thumb brushed against her asshole and she responded by lifting her butt - a clear sign for him to lick his digit and push it into that tight hole. 

"Let me have a go!" Greg said with the eagerness of someone waiting for a rollercoaster ride. 

Amber exulted in her friends' delight at getting to fuck her. Greg's cock had a lot of girth to it. Amber stared at it as her friend went to mount her.

"Wait," she said, "Sit on the sofa. I want to fuck you."

Greg obeyed, and she guided him into position so that his quivering dick pointed straight up at the ceiling. Amber helped him unroll a condom then carefully straddled his legs before lowering herself until she'd taken his full length. She put her hand under his chin then leaned in to kiss him deeply. As she did this she felt Leo's tongue on her ass and gasped into Greg's mouth.

"OK?" Leo asked, concerned at her reaction.
"Very OK," she confirmed.

The coolness of her saliva-slick hole was met with the warmth of Leo's eager tongue. It felt so intimate being licked there, but then it felt pretty damned intimate having Greg's dick in her cunt. How fortunate she was to have friends who were so happy to help fulfil this fantasy.

Amber turned and gave Leo a coy look. She then grabbed for his cock and aimed it at her other hole before returning her attention to Greg. Leo received the signal loud and clear. He stood and placed his manhood where his tongue had just been. His oral efforts had succeeded in getting his friend sufficiently lubricated. With just the slightest resistance, Amber's ass swallowed his attentive cock.

Oh god, so much dick, she thought, I'm stuffed with dick. Amber rocked back and forth, pushing Greg in deeper one way, taking Leo in deeper the other. It was a feeling of fullness, of satisfying two men at the same time, which pushed her ever closer to the brink of orgasm

She was very much aware that she was the only one who was naked, the boys having only unfastened their flies to let loose their fuck tools. This situation made her feel extremely aroused and she momentarily gave herself entirely to the energetic thrusting.

"Oh god!" she surprised herself, "I'm going to cum!"

Her two fucktoys didn't relent. They pounded and fondled and encouraged as her body's reflexes responded to the rush of purest pleasure. Greg's cock squelched in and out of her now-soaking wet cunt until she could take no more. 

"OK, OK, I'm done. Thank you. Thank you."

Leo delicately withdrew from Amber's ass, allowing her to raise herself off of Greg before collapsing onto the sofa. The boys tucked themselves away before falling in either side of their friend, stroking and hugging her through the post-orgasm high. It was all over so quickly, but Amber had got what she wanted.